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BAI KUKE, CAMEROON – Frida Nembe, 61, are an eloquent and smart woman in Bai Kuke, a village of Balong tribe from inside the southwestern Cameroon. Previously, she became a “feminine partner.”
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She says you to their merely child together with her late spouse died, and she is not any longer able to find expecting. Thus she turned into a husband herself, a woman spouse.
“While i had married back at my later partner, I offered birth to at least one youngster which died a couple of years after,” Nembe says. “It is hence that we married my spouse therefore you to she will happen an infant who can inherit my personal possessions while i perish.”
Nembe claims she did most of the old-fashioned rites that one manage would in order to get married a lady to get married her partner, who had been of another Balong community.
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“We decided to go to their village, satisfied their unique some one and paid off her complete dowry,” she states. “I then delivered their particular back at my family to live on with me and you can incur youngsters inside my label.”
She claims one to Balong customs lets female to get married to other feamales in cases where women are barren otherwise have no pupils. Even women that need extra children but they are incapable of consider them will get wed other female.
Nembe states that female adhere to old-fashioned gender jobs. The newest childbirth woman will get the latest wife from the matrimony, just like the most other woman will act as a lady husband.
“My spouse is actually designed to stay in my house, create college students for me, assist me inside cleaning and you will farmwork,” she claims. “She’s supposed to suffice me like a partner is to serve their particular partner, and i also usually therefore cure their such as for example a spouse is to treat his spouse. I am meant to capture responsibility from their needs.”
Each other wives as well as their female husbands feel the versatility so far men outside of the relationships. But Nembe states that a respectful spouse might be choosy regarding this new men who she dates as well as be open in the all of them with her women spouse, that will become the “father” of any college students one result from their unique wife’s extramarital relationships.
“Women married along these lines feel the liberty to decide any man which they esteem and have pregnant,” she claims. “But, these feminine don’t need to share with new men they sleep with this he is guilty of the pregnancy, however if they become pregnant, as the youngster will end up the infant of their particular [female] partner.”
She says any man just who states become dad off an infant need certainly to take on which traditions. Children make the surnames of its feminine dads.
“In the event that unconditionally one shows up in order to claim that such as for example a child is his,” she states, “they have to pay right back the entire dowry of woman worried.”
“My spouse involved home and said she will maybe not be able to stick with myself,” she claims. “She informed she desires to return to their individuals. We allow her to go, but Really don’t imagine this woman is still my partner once the she is no longer in my house, and you will she actually is delivering people at random within her town.”
Nembe states you to she does not thought those individuals college students due to the fact hers due to the fact their unique previous wife provided beginning to them away from their unique home that have unknown men. She says she regrets marrying their particular.
“I ought to has examined really well before getting partnered to this girl,” Nembe states during the a low tone. “I ought to possess acquired hitched so you’re able to a female that will regard myself at each and every provided date. I feel dissapointed about dropping into the incorrect hand.”